Thanks Given

Merry Christmas everyone! Well it’s time to put up the tree and sing some carols. Oh, wait… Thanksgiving is the holiday that’s coming up! With all the Christmas commercials on TV and the stores putting decorations up, I couldn’t tell. Let’s get back to where we were. Happy Thanksgiving everyone! The time where we come together with our families, gorge ourselves with turkey and other foods, and tell the same old boring stories that we tell every year is close. Yes, this is a great time to celebrate all that we love and cherish, and then forget about it and go on with our lives. Ah yes, Thanksgiving is wonderful isn’t it?

But where did Thanksgiving come from? Well, back in the seventeenth century, the English government was persecuting a religious group known as the Pilgrims. Seeing that the English were jerks and that they would be in trouble if they didn’t leave, the Pilgrims left the country and sailed west to the New World. I wonder if they were thinking, “We are sailing into the unknown, and do not know how long it will take to get there and if we will die. This sounds like a great plan.” What were they to do?

They arrived in Plymouth, Massachusetts, and soon found out that things were pretty horrible there. The supplies they brought were not enough to survive the winter, and they were too lazy to do any of the work themselves. Many of them died due to disease and famine; remember that when you’re stuffing yourself with food. Then when all seemed lost, a friendly native named Squanto came to help the Pilgrims. He taught them how to plant crops and survive in the wilderness, just like Bear Grylls. The Pilgrims then invited Squanto and his tribe to a meal of thanksgiving…Just a very nice occasion and nothing could ruin it. Well, the taking of Squanto’s tribe’s land and the land of other natives could put a damper on the holiday spirit, but let’s not focus on that. Let’s focus on all the great things Thanksgiving has to offer, like bringing your family together, and then having them fight over some stupid issue like some sale or a movie. Then there’s eating some delicious food, like stuffing, which we stick up a turkey’s butt, and think nothing of. Well, that’s enough talk of Thanksgiving. I’ll be off now to carve the Arbor Day pumpkin, or whatever.