OP’s Real Romance

It seems as though each year a pair of OP faculty gets engaged. While these romances continue to pop up, I want to highlight the real romance of OP faculty for the good cheer of Valentine’s Day. Mr. Maybe and Mr. Daugherty are practically lovebirds (this is putting it lightly). You can call it a bromance, romance, or true love, it does not matter. This is one such example of how the OP brotherhood extends past the student body and into the faculty. There have been multiple occasions where a bunch of teachers have gone out to a Mets game or other sporting event outside of school. These two go and support each other at the basketball games, coaching half of the time, staring into the other’s eyes the other half. It is perhaps the cutest thing watching them team up to clean the basketball court. Mr. Daugherty sprays water while Mr. Maybe pulls a mop behind him. The combination of teamwork and passion makes this event something that I will try to stop by and watch if I am feeling down. While this event may define their relationship, the pinnacle was when they exchanged gifts in front of the student body at Christmas at OP. Mr. Daugherty gave Mr. Maybe a towel and a squirt bottle while Mr. Maybe reciprocated with a funny golf prank kit. To end this analysis, I asked both of these personalities to describe their relationship with the other:

How long have you two been together?

They have known each other for three years at OP. However, this bromance started a while back in the 2000s when we played high school sports against each other.

What is your fondest memory together?

There have been so many great moments. Mr. Maybe pounded out sixty steaks at the beefsteak dinner. Also, we play a game called Polish Ping Pong. The ball can only bounce one time on the ground and it must be returned to the table. Running around the table, the person who hits the ball next is determined by a predetermined order, usually Maybe to Daugherty to Baressi. There are many times Mr. Maybe needed to full layout. Mr. Daugherty did not struggle as much because has much better hand-eye coordination. If you lose the point, then you gain a letter that spells “Polish.” The first person to spell out the word is the loser.

Mr. Daugherty also recalled another story, this one relating to a game of disc golf. First, he wanted to make it clear that if Mr. Maybe is on record saying that he beat his better half in something, then that is blasphemy because his buddy and part-time scorekeeper was not in attendance (Mr. Maybe allegedly holds the staff record for disc golf, but nobody was there to confirm it). Mr. Maybe responded to this statement by saying, “It’s a win.” Anyways, they had a joyful time when Mr. Maybe failed in crunch time of one of their iconic matches. Mr. Maybe was winning after 17 holes. With Baressi, McCrystal, Kaounis, Gaertner, and Parsells in attendance, Mr. Maybe took his second shot of a par four. All was well until he threw his frisbee sideways and watched it roll down a hill and into a river. From there, his morale plummeted as the current washed the frisbee away. He had no disc to play and took the L. Mr. Maybe then still complains that the “hippies” (maintenance staff) should take the blame for freshly cutting the grass. Apparently, if the grass was thicker, the frisbee would have been slowed down to enough of a degree to prevent the frisbee from entering the water.

If the other person were to describe you what would they say?

Mr. Maybe: He would say I am a bumbling idiot that is very easily trolled. He feels he is athletically superior to me at everything except disk golf (controversial). I am the mule and should never ask any questions when he cracks the whip. It has happened multiple times and has continued to happen. I hope that out of the kindness of his heart, he will stop this.

Mr. Daugherty: He knows I am a distinguished gentleman and also his role model and idol.

How do you view the other person’s analysis above

Mr. Daugherty: Accurate. 100%.

Mr. Maybe: Idol is a bit much. However, we do have similar interests.

How has OP helped you become as close as you are now?

Mr. Daugherty jumps to the quick response of being forced to share an office. *Mr. Maybe then gets offended that Mr. Daugherty used the word “FORCED” when he mentions sharing an office* Anyways, they are both involved in the Phys Ed program. When neither of them has a class, they can use some of the golf balls to have some fun competition.

How do you feel about the results of the poll Will Logerfo put out on the Omega website? (Daugherty on top by wide margin)

Mr. Maybe: Coming up short in the voting process is something that this writer should be all too familiar with since it is the story of his life  — unless we are talking about his brother who is even shorter. The only thing I have beaten Mr. Daugherty in was a controversial disk golf score.

Mr. Daugherty: It went exactly as I thought it would. He probably logged on and voted multiple times, which is the only reason why he has any votes. Mr. Maybe did in fact vote for himself out of desperation.