Cats: A “Didn’t-Watch-the-Movie” Review

Oh good God. Do I 100% mean that? I hope you know that I do. If you haven’t seen the reveal trailer or the numerous reviews, pictures, and rants on the internet, then you might not have heard about Cats, which was recently adapted from Andrew Lloyd Webber’s hit musical, has been raving around the internet for the past few days, for a very unfortunate reason. The film was verbally destroyed by numerous reviewers and coffee-drinking blog posters. In their defence, it has every right to be.

The most notable difference between this film and the play was the new use of the ‘revolutionary’ fur technology that they used on the impressive list of casting actors. While it is an impressive technological feat, it couldn’t do anything to do well to give the film foundational support. If anything, sticking with the play’s original costumes and designs of the characters would’ve been a million times better. After all, I can’t stand seeing Judi Dench’s face on a furry, anthropomorphic cat body. Who asked for that?

Not to mention, as far as I can see, what’s the plot? Are the cats just going out to the milk bar for a fun time? Is there any sort of murder or horror to give the audience a little scare? Anything? The trailer barely gives anything to see other than choreographed furry cat-human-hybrids dancing and acting like cats (also weird). 

Albeit, the film does have its ups. The music is done well and the choreographing looks straight out of Broadway. Those are ups that are definitely important to note, considering the talent that was put into the film. The singing within the trailer was of excellent quality and deserves remarkable praise. Also, can we talk about the set? The way every one of the “cats” was smaller than everything through extreme set design was fantastic! However, I hate to say that those won’t save me from the terror of looking at furry Judi Dench.

Although there are significant strengths that this film possesses, I can definitely say that it is not within my interest to view this film. I personally find this film not pleasing. Also, furry Judi Dench is a no-no. However, if someone else finds their time in the theater watching this enjoyable, then I’m glad they did! Sometimes people get a kick out of something I don’t understand, and that’s perfectly fine.